Saturday, January 08, 2011

My First Week of 2011 - Do Hard Things/Seek God First

Okay, I may have had another unpleasant Christmas but year 2010 ended better than the past years. Even though I got sick during the last days, I was more enthusiastic and optimistic. Almost always am I optimistic when I get sick and I don't know why neither do I want to know why. Furthermore, I think I celebrated CHRISTmas later. This week, I have been listening to Christmas songs and thought, "everyday should be CHRISTmas". Yeah, Christmas to me is peace and goodwill to men, but it's not always peace. Now I'm thinking, my relationship with God is more important than good tidings.

Right in the middle of my "devotion" tonight, I thought to start journaling my 2011. Journaling a year? I think this impulsive action is being motivated by another impulsive action, my One-Year-PhotoChallenge. But hey, it's better to do something or do A LOT than do nothing.

Ten things I have in mind upon the start of 2011 or this first week, chronologically (this is not some kind of new year's resolution, I don't do resolutions, never done it before either):
  1. 365 Days PhotoChallenge
  2. 1st week of January - hunt nurses for my draft
  3. 2nd week of January - make my final draft and hunt nurses to sign
  4. Clean my room and pack to transfer to another room (hope to do tomorrow, Saturday)
  5. Read the 30-Day New Believers Studies section of my devotional Bible (NCV) edited by Max Lucado (it has become my "devotion")
  6. "Seek first the kingdom of God" Matt.6:33
  7. Go out often
  8. Time is precious
  9. One at a time
  10. Journal 2011 weekly
So far, I'm doing well with my PhotoChallenge but having some slight dilemma regarding the use of dSLR (considering its shutter life). I was able to obtain the nurses' names and license numbers except I forgot their titles/degrees. It was very disappointing and I was overwhelmed because I had to go back again, but I'd go back to the hospitals next week on Monday.

"Seek ye first the kingdom of God" has not left my head since Monday. The past few months, I was unhappy and maybe the seasonal depression thing; however this week, I think it's all about joy and I know it came from God alone, not from me, not from anyone, neither from me seeking to be happy. And speaking of happy, I qoute from Max Lucado's NCV, "But the truly happy people are those who carefully study God's perfect law that makes people free, and they continue to study it. They do not forget what they heard, but they obey what God's teaching says. Those who do this will be made happy." (James 1:25, qouted in Day 4 of 30-Day New Believer Studies section)

Every time I feel like doing nothing, "seek ye first the kingdom of God" comes to mind. Also, I have made this verse as my screen wallpaper of my computer, and every time I open my computer or even touch it in the morning after waking up, I remember the verse which then lead me to remember those 8 things I mentioned above (excluding 9 and 10 which came just tonight).

Go out often. I really have to do this. *sigh* I heard another complaint at home about money matters today. Ugh! I really hate talking/hearing/discussing about it. I should use my money for every expense I spend they say. Could it be easier to tolerate their complains if I were working and having a house of my own? And if only the environment is safer (from pollution) like before. But now, everywhere is dust and heat. Hurts my respiratory track and my head-skin-eyes respectively (poor immune system and very sensitive). And the noise hurts my ears too. They're so confusing. They encourage to keep safe from such bodily abuse but complain to be exposed. Blah blah blah. Only an hour later did I forget about this bad thing, these complains (well, it's not just that, there are a lot). When they complain, there is blame coated underneath. Also, could this forgetting be a good thing without resolution? (Oh, and I physically hurt myself again after taking their complains.) These happened right before I was at the last chapter of my day (meaning "time to go to my room and ready for my night").

I just want to end this week well.

Made another video. Even though I really wanted to stop accepting services, I could not say No to this one because they are from church and their tone of voice (when they told me) was an assurance that I will take their request. Money matters AGAIN! Never mind. I just hope I won't be facing any more money talks (but at home, this could be impossible.)

I still have tomorrow to face and end this week. I just pray and devote myself to "seek God first" and yeah, one at a time. Oh, and this could be the 11th but faint thing: Read books. Faint because I still leave out this one. I have Do Hard Things to read and I don't even remember when I started reading it. However, this book is a good read, not just good but GREAT. And maybe this is the zeroth |zeer-ohth| (0th) thing: Do Hard Things. The title of the book has been imprinted (hopefully forever) in my head. I'm inspired with awe and influenced by it. I also have to start reading lots of books to keep my brain working and functional and productive. My brain tells me that reading books stop me from being complacent like I was complacent over my studies before I became a bookworm, and I don't want to go back to that complacency.

Today, Friday, I was making my assignment for Bible Study. I learned the life of Augustine of Hippo, Francis of Assisi, Martin Luther, John Wesley, and Mother Theresa. The verses that changed their lives have some influence in me too. Read their lives in Wikipedia. I was also ready for Bible Study; however, it was canceled because many could not make it. So sad. Very sad. When I went home, I thought I would just read my Day 6 of 30-Day Studies which I hadn't read today until tonight. And what if I'd forget what I studied? Oh well, might as well read about them again. I like Martin Luther's story or maybe it's John Wesley. Now I forgot.

Still, even though every thing in this world is limited, God is never limited. However, I still don't like the thought of the reality of this world. I just want God to be my reality.

Even though there had been few times of bad times, I just think of "seeking God first" then somehow, I feel free deep inside. May not be happy but content.

Dear God, I thank you for this week. Keep and continue me to be motivated and up-and-working. Continue filling me with Your Words and Your Holy Spirit. Also please help me to finally clean my room completely. In Jesus' Name, Amen

P.s. I just got sick recently.

No comments: